“Login and have fun discreetly with many married woman”

Got great news today from a spelling-challenged woman named Samantha, complete with Access Login and Message Number:

Your marriage is boring but you can still have a lot of fun.

Have great SEX GUARANTEED and no one will ever know

Put some spice into the week

Your wife will NEVER find out these local married woman want to have sex with you on the side

YOU REALLY HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE

Life is too short not to have sex – Start now

I know this has to be legitimate because it informs me that it will be seen all over the news today, including CNN, FOX News, USA Today, The Wall Street Journal, and TIME Magazine.

But before I commit to this chance of a lifetime, I do have one question. I know about sex from the front and from the rear. But how do you have sex on the side?